Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Rock & Roll Heart and Spiritual Warfare

years of endless roads of extreme lonliness, truck stop showers, flop houses, shelters, missions, rejected, inspected, neglected, infected, these are a few of my favorite things down the road of my glorious dreams but i would not trade any of it for anything.

there is nothing better than to have people run up to me and say that my words or music changed their life for the better or made them at least stop and think about it a little differently.

powerful, powerful stuff!

looking down at a crowd and watching them sing a song you wrote cannot be described.

it goes beyond words to a magical place, a place where you are not judged by race or class, ugly or pretty, where you can be you and others can be them and celebrate it all at once.

when you decide that you are going to start living your dreams, it is a scary thing, the fear alone stops most people and if it doesn't, the process does.

it is not an easy road to walk, but it is not hard either.

i read a statistic that said over 80% of americans are unhappy with their job but still continue to go to it daily and put all that energy into being more miserable, that to me is absurdity in its highest form.

fear is a powerful thing and has a strong grip on most of our happiness.

i own nothing but a bag of clothes but the experiences i have had over the last decade are priceless, the good, the bad, and the ugly all shaped me into who i am today and if it wasn't for that fire i endured, i know i couldn't have affected people on the level i do.

too often people give up too quick on their dreams when they are right there at them.

all the failures are necessary in shaping you and preparing you for the things to come so endure the storms and you'll find that dreams do pay off, or go to a job you hate with a boss you hate even more because you don't have the courage to face what you were made for...

the choice is yours and it is never too late to begin!!!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Slipping Away or Choosing To Stay

i hear all the time things about hell.
lake of fire, torture, etc.
sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me.
hell to me is distance from God.
seperation from your creator.
not believing in yourself and your dreams.
life can get bleak, raw, and unbearable at this point.
i don't half step into anything, never have, and that goes from trying to kill myself to trying to top the charts to my dreams.
i have always had the mental all or nothing.
full blown rage, love, and pride.
full blown fool, livin raw as fuck with NO fat in my existence.
i'm either a complete success or a complete piece of shit on the streets of los angeles watching the helicopters fly over me as i try to die in a dark beat down alley.
don't believe me, click on the picture above and take a good look at my face, you might not believe my mouth but my eyes always hold the truth.
when i have been on the bottom, i have lived on the streets and slid through the gutter, i have taunted gang members to shoot me and beat me, walkin through Nickerson Gardens at night yellin at the top of my lungs because i didn't have the balls to pull the trigger on myself, and i got my wish but i'm still alive and breathing and for a very good reason.

i dove to depths that would make most shit their pants and when i have been on top, i have been in 1000 dollar a night suites in the Argyle on Sunset bringing my dreams to life and sparkin people to go out and get their own dreams.
my point to this you ask?
bottom or top, it's all the same amount of energy, you can go either way you want, tell yourself you are shit or a star, live or die,
in the end it is up to you and only you to create yourself and a world that you want to live in regardless what anybody tells you.
ugly, fat, unwanted, outsider, hated, convict, 2 strikes, three time loser, loved, pretty, popular, most succesful,
God's gonna love you whether you like it or not
and as long as you are still breathing, you still have a purpose in this world to live out.
You can turn the most negative situation or lifestlye into a positive one.
The more negative your life is just means it can be all the more powerful and positive when you do turn it around.
nobody and i mean NOBODY can stop you but yourself.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

The Little Things

it's been over 100 degrees in los angeles lately.
a true rarity.
i've been sleepin in my car and the humidity at night is unbearable.
went 3 days without a shower.
decided it was time and checked into a hotel to handle business.

as i was checking in,
there was this guy at the desk all pissed off because his remote wouldn't work.

about 20 flashes ran thru my mind of all the places i've slept in the street over the past 5 years and how raw it has been at times.

i had a really hard time trying to understand that this guy couldn't live without his remote control in his air conditioned room.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

Life and Traffic

i was sitting in traffic yesterday.

interstate 5 southbound coming out of East LA.

6 lanes completly packed going 5 mph.

it took me an hour and 20 minutes to go 9 miles.

as i was sitting there it suddenly hit me like a gunshot to the chest...

all of us are sitting here waiting in this big line of cars and none of us know where the hell we are really going...

day after day, mile after mile, waiting in traffic...

i started looking around...

i bet some of these people are just following the herd because it's comfortable...

lined up waiting to be devoured by hell.

Friday, August 31, 2007

Question Your Reality

I got this off of Aleister Crowley’s page. It’s so brilliant I had to share it in a bulletin. Enjoy!

Question your beliefs, your reason for existence. Question your will. What will become of you in the end? This is necessary for all of humanity, but most of us do not seek out an answer. We merely continue on, conforming to a society that creates a perpetual state of depression and increases the tendency towards suicide. Ask yourself, what are you doing it for? Take an honest look at the pillars of this civilization, media destroys truth, schools destroy knowledge, religions destroy spirituality, and governments destroy freedom. Ponder the meaning of Your Own existence and what YOU could become with your own self will. Not the dogma of greed stricken establishments. Running along the path of capital gain to be on TV and show how much money they have, rather than pronounce themselves true to their instincts and true to their hearts. Today our world - (both internal and external) is literally full of hate and war, and this conflict is just a piece in the grand design of the Gods. At the dawn of every new Aeon there is a clash between the old and the new. At present humanity is being summoned along the path of enlightenment, while we must still shake free from the chains of fear and false love. Secrets are kept veiled from humanity through religion, the governments of the world, and their voice in the media. The absolute most relevant issue of the day is mind control, but those whom we trust to keep us informed are not mentioning this for a reason. They have hidden higher levels of consciousness from all! They continue to halt and erode the intellectual growth of humanity. They lie to you about what they know, consciously telling everyone half truths pertaining to the mind, body and beyond... The Truth is that we all have to wake up from a hypnotism that is installed in our minds from birth. By accessing the potential of the human mind we all can use many powers in ourselves. Strengths that we have previously been prohibited from developing due to a form of mass mind control. We have to take control of our minds. Of Our Will! With will power we can de-program ourselves from the brainwashing nonsense that has been installed in our minds by the spiritual and material elite. The elite know how to use this power and have no problem using it against you. They are extraordinarily wealthy and wicked; their loyal servants are your 'religious' leaders and your government. They control your media, your education systems, and your authorities. They protect you and keep you dumb for a reason. You are their slave. And they are the walls to your prison. There is no better way to keep slaves in slavery than to have them think they are free. Why would you want to escape your current life, the only life you know of, if you do not know a better life exists? Throughout history slaves have always been a valuable and highly protected resource. Today is no different. You are a slave. You are given one choice from birth - to commit yourself to a system or suffer the consequences. It's true whether you believe it or not. There is a freedom from your slavery, from the cage they have built around your true possibility. It's time for you to know that freedom.